Well, Katie has been home with us for a little over 2 months, and for a little under 2 months, we've been dealing with her name. We chose the spelling Kathryn for Katie's name for 2 reasons: we prefer the way it looks, and we have ancestors on both sides with that same spelling. When we were in Moscow in May, Andrei and Sergei needed to draft some documents for the court hearing with her new name, so Andrei had us write that down. He was very insistent that we spell it correctly the way we want it to be spelled so that there are no mistakes. We got the message after the first time he told us, and we wrote down her new name for him.
Between our second and third trips Andrei obtained the court decree, birth certificate, adoption certificate, etc. and the translators translated them into English for us, for the Embassy, and for Immigration. When we returned for our third and final trip, Andrei had all these documents and he was pretty much guarding them with his life until we went through the Embassy at the end of the week. I don't think he trusted us very much. When we finally were able to see the documents, we saw that every single one had her name spelled Katherine. While that is a beautiful spelling, it is not the one that we chose for our daughter. The problem is that even though there are several ways to spell that name in English, there is only one way to spell it in Russian. Russian is a phonetic alphabet so there is only one way to write each sound in a word. Therefore, going from English to Russian was quite simple, but going from Russian to English means the translator needs to make sure he/she chooses the correct spelling. There is a standard handbook that translators use, and apparently it has the spelling of Katherine. This wouldn't have been a problem if the error had been caught and new translations were completed. However, this did not occur, and by the time we even saw the documents it was too late. Andrei had already sent all the translators on vacation because except for us, there wasn't going to be any more work for them for 2-3 more weeks. There was no one to correct all these documents, so we had to submit them as they were to the Embassy and Immigration.
After we returned home, we contacted Olga at our agency and explained the problem to her. She redid the translations for the birth certificate, adoption certificate, and adoption decree with the correct spelling. Meanwhile, the Certificate of Citizenship arrived with, of course, the wrong spelling. We have to use this certificate to get Katie's social security number, so we're stuck until that gets corrected. I contacted our local USCIS office and inquired about what I need to do. If Immigration made an error, then they will replace the certificate for free. If Immigration did not make an error, then there is a fee of $380 to replace the certificate. They requested copies of the original documents to see how her name was spelled to determine if they are at fault. Three weeks later, USCIS informed me that all the documents had her name as Kathryn except for one: the adoption decree. According to USCIS, they have to go by the name as it appears in the adoption decree. Therefore, the error was not due to Immigration but rather due to the incorrect translation done by the agency. Consequently, we need to go to the courthouse, have her name legally changed from Katherine to Kathryn, and mail that document along with form N-565, the original Certificate of Citizenship, and a check for $380 to get a new certificate. Since we didn't do anything wrong, we don't want to pay the fee. We explained all this to our agency and asked for them to reimburse us for the fee. After a week of them researching this matter, our agency declared that the name for the Certificate of Citizenship should not come from the adoption decree but from the Visa application, which is filled out by the parents (and has the correct spelling) pursuant to statute blah, blah, blah. So the agency's stance is that Immigration was at fault and needs to replace the certificate for free. Frankly, I don't really care who was at fault, but I have to put on my detective hat and go sleuthing through this mess to figure it all out. Katie needs to have her name spelled correctly everywhere, she needs a social security number, and I need to keep $380 in my bank account.
So today I called USCIS, and after I pushed all the necessary numbers on the phone to get to a live person (shockingly, none of the automated options quite suited my situation), I spoke with Andrea. She gave me the email address to the adoption officer at our local USCIS office and advised me to explain the situation along with my name, date of birth, country of birth, first pet's name, and my 6th grade locker combination. I should hear a response in 2-3 business days.
Meanwhile, we had Katie screened at our school district last Wednesday, and she qualified for the Early Childhood Center. Yea! She was average for motor skills, but her language and concepts were low enough for her to get in. Her language delay is for obvious reasons, and the concepts skills are language based. For example, to demonstrate that she understands the concept of "under," she was told to "put the block under the house." Well, she has to know what put, block, under, and house all mean in order to complete the task. I was actually impressed with all she could do after only being in our country for 2 months. As I was filling out all the enrollment information, I saw that her social security number was required. My heart sank, because at the rate the process is going it'll be spring before she gets it, and I really want her to start as soon as possible. She is so ready for school right now. I called the school and explained the situation, and they said that it wouldn't be a problem, they won't keep her out, and I can just give them that number once I know it. Once again, yea!
So the saga continues as I wait to hear from the adoption officer at the USCIS office.
I know I'm doing a terrible job with posting pictures, but that's because I'm doing a terrible job with taking the pictures. I promise that I will take some pictures soon and I'll post them. However, at the rate I'm going, they're just going to be their Halloween pictures. As a teaser, let me just tell you that they are Peter Pan, Tinkerbell, and Captain Hook, and you've never seen a cuter group from Neverland!
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Friday, October 10, 2008
To See or Not To See?
Derek and I flew to Detroit, MI on Wednesday for a follow up appointment with his retinal specialist, Dr. Trese. We've been seeing him for almost 8 years, and he knows Derek's eyes better than anyone else in the world. Also, he is one of, if not the, best retinal specialist specializing in Retinopathy of Prematurity in the world. We have met people from Mexico, The Netherlands, and Italy who have flown to Detroit just to see him. The least I can do is fly from Kansas City. We use Angel Flight -- an organization where pilots donate their time, plane, and gas to fly people for medical appointments -- for these flights. The best part is that the pilot we always use is my dad. Everybody wins: Derek gets to his appointment, Derek gets to fly (which he LOVES), I don't have to pay for it, I get to catch up on my sleep on the plane (hee, hee), my dad can claim the gas expense as a deduction since it's a charitable contribution, and my dad has an excuse (as if he needed one) to be off in the wild blue yonder. Dad is also a certified flight instructor, and one of his students actually flew the plane this time with Dad in the right-hand seat.
We took off a little after 8:00 and landed at Detroit City Airport a little after 12:00. It was a 3-hour flight with a one-hour time change. The student made a great landing despite the heavy cloud coverage and rain in Detroit. We ate at the same Subway that we eat at every single time, and got to our 2:00 appointment with time to spare. Dr. Trese got a pretty good look at Derek's eyes, and everything seems to be unchanged. At this point, "no news is good news." We are just trying to keep Derek's eyes healthy and viable for future technologies. The worst thing that can happen now is for one or both of Derek's eyes to stop growing, shrink, and eventually die. If that happens, then there is no hope. As long as his eyes hang in there, there is hope. Right now, Derek's left eye (the good one) has a large area of attached retina, but it is very thin and avascular, and therefore doesn't work right. Derek's right eye is cloudy due to a swollen cornea that he's had for a few years. Therefore, Dr. Trese can't see all the way to the back of the eye to know if there is any attached retina. Often when the retina is detached, it will "float" up to the front of the eye. Dr. Trese can only see about the front 1/4 of Derek's right eye, but he doesn't see any retina in that part, so that's something. When we have done VEPs (Visually Evoked Potential) in the past, they show some brain activity in response to his right eye, so Dr. Trese believes that he at least has something attached back there. A VEP is where they attach electrodes to the back of Derek's head, right where his occipital lobe is. The occipital lobe is where vision is processed. Then they cover one eye, shine a strobe light, and record the brain activity for about 10 minutes. Then they repeat this with the other eye. Finally, they do this with both eyes open. This test cannot deliver a false positive or a false negative. If there is brain activity, then he saw something. The stronger the response, the greater the vision. We've done 3 of these in Derek's life, and each time Derek's eyes have seen something, with the left eye having a greater response. A corneal transplant would probably take care of the cloudiness, but since Derek is blind, he's not exactly a candidate. Per Dr. Trese, we're going to try some new drops for about a month, and if we see improvement, great. If not, we'll stop them.
Derek's next appointment will be in 6-8 months, and this one will be an exam under anesthesia (EUA). For this, we'll fly up on a Sunday, spend the night, and report to the hospital some time on Monday. While Derek is under anesthesia, they will get a really good look at his eyes and be able to check his pressures as well. Many kids with ROP develop glaucoma, so that's why it's so important to check his pressures periodically. So far, his pressures have always been perfect with the help of his current eye drops. The actual exam only takes about 15 minutes, but we're at the hospital for about 3-4 hours. Then we'll fly home that night. We fly commercial for Derek's EUAs, and since his insurance covers travel expenses it won't hurt our budget (yea!). For the last couple of years, Derek has had an EUA in October, and an office visit in April. Since Derek is getting older and more compliant in the office, we were able to do 2 office visits before doing another EUA. Small victory.
After our appointment was over, we drove back to the airport, and took off. We had a roller coaster moment as we were ascending, when the student pilot had to rely on his instruments rather than his vision (due to the clouds) to determine the plane's position in the air. After some time and instruction, the student leveled out the plane, and I was able to resume reading my book. Other than that, we had an uneventful flight home, and landed at about 8:00. It was a 12-hour day, but that's better than a 13-hour drive one way!
As for the future technologies, stem cells have been in the forefront of possibilities for Derek. Dr. Trese has one hand in the office and one hand in the research, so he knows exactly what's going on. Unfortunately, the stem cells are going to take some more research and won't be ready in the 2-5 years that Dr. Trese had thought. What's happening is that when the stem cells are injected in the retina, they are not integrating with the retinal cells to regenerate. Instead, the cells are dividing on top of themselves, creating a lump -- a benign tumor. They are experimenting with trying to "train" the cells (whatever that means), and that has shown better results, but still not what we want. Another possibility is the micro chip. This is implanted in the retina, and a processor is implanted in the brain. Between the two, they can send the visual message to the brain and the person can have some sight. The micro chip is only 60 pixels, but the image is not as grainy as you would think. Individuals are able to see contrasts, shadows, large objects, etc. If Derek is ever able to see enough to maneuver in his environment, we would be thrilled. Right now, the estimation for when the micro chip would be ready and on the market is 2 years. I won't hold my breath, but we'll see. Nonetheless, whenever the technology is there, Derek's left eye should be a candidate.
Please keep him in your prayers, and we'll see what the future holds for him.
We took off a little after 8:00 and landed at Detroit City Airport a little after 12:00. It was a 3-hour flight with a one-hour time change. The student made a great landing despite the heavy cloud coverage and rain in Detroit. We ate at the same Subway that we eat at every single time, and got to our 2:00 appointment with time to spare. Dr. Trese got a pretty good look at Derek's eyes, and everything seems to be unchanged. At this point, "no news is good news." We are just trying to keep Derek's eyes healthy and viable for future technologies. The worst thing that can happen now is for one or both of Derek's eyes to stop growing, shrink, and eventually die. If that happens, then there is no hope. As long as his eyes hang in there, there is hope. Right now, Derek's left eye (the good one) has a large area of attached retina, but it is very thin and avascular, and therefore doesn't work right. Derek's right eye is cloudy due to a swollen cornea that he's had for a few years. Therefore, Dr. Trese can't see all the way to the back of the eye to know if there is any attached retina. Often when the retina is detached, it will "float" up to the front of the eye. Dr. Trese can only see about the front 1/4 of Derek's right eye, but he doesn't see any retina in that part, so that's something. When we have done VEPs (Visually Evoked Potential) in the past, they show some brain activity in response to his right eye, so Dr. Trese believes that he at least has something attached back there. A VEP is where they attach electrodes to the back of Derek's head, right where his occipital lobe is. The occipital lobe is where vision is processed. Then they cover one eye, shine a strobe light, and record the brain activity for about 10 minutes. Then they repeat this with the other eye. Finally, they do this with both eyes open. This test cannot deliver a false positive or a false negative. If there is brain activity, then he saw something. The stronger the response, the greater the vision. We've done 3 of these in Derek's life, and each time Derek's eyes have seen something, with the left eye having a greater response. A corneal transplant would probably take care of the cloudiness, but since Derek is blind, he's not exactly a candidate. Per Dr. Trese, we're going to try some new drops for about a month, and if we see improvement, great. If not, we'll stop them.
Derek's next appointment will be in 6-8 months, and this one will be an exam under anesthesia (EUA). For this, we'll fly up on a Sunday, spend the night, and report to the hospital some time on Monday. While Derek is under anesthesia, they will get a really good look at his eyes and be able to check his pressures as well. Many kids with ROP develop glaucoma, so that's why it's so important to check his pressures periodically. So far, his pressures have always been perfect with the help of his current eye drops. The actual exam only takes about 15 minutes, but we're at the hospital for about 3-4 hours. Then we'll fly home that night. We fly commercial for Derek's EUAs, and since his insurance covers travel expenses it won't hurt our budget (yea!). For the last couple of years, Derek has had an EUA in October, and an office visit in April. Since Derek is getting older and more compliant in the office, we were able to do 2 office visits before doing another EUA. Small victory.
After our appointment was over, we drove back to the airport, and took off. We had a roller coaster moment as we were ascending, when the student pilot had to rely on his instruments rather than his vision (due to the clouds) to determine the plane's position in the air. After some time and instruction, the student leveled out the plane, and I was able to resume reading my book. Other than that, we had an uneventful flight home, and landed at about 8:00. It was a 12-hour day, but that's better than a 13-hour drive one way!
As for the future technologies, stem cells have been in the forefront of possibilities for Derek. Dr. Trese has one hand in the office and one hand in the research, so he knows exactly what's going on. Unfortunately, the stem cells are going to take some more research and won't be ready in the 2-5 years that Dr. Trese had thought. What's happening is that when the stem cells are injected in the retina, they are not integrating with the retinal cells to regenerate. Instead, the cells are dividing on top of themselves, creating a lump -- a benign tumor. They are experimenting with trying to "train" the cells (whatever that means), and that has shown better results, but still not what we want. Another possibility is the micro chip. This is implanted in the retina, and a processor is implanted in the brain. Between the two, they can send the visual message to the brain and the person can have some sight. The micro chip is only 60 pixels, but the image is not as grainy as you would think. Individuals are able to see contrasts, shadows, large objects, etc. If Derek is ever able to see enough to maneuver in his environment, we would be thrilled. Right now, the estimation for when the micro chip would be ready and on the market is 2 years. I won't hold my breath, but we'll see. Nonetheless, whenever the technology is there, Derek's left eye should be a candidate.
Please keep him in your prayers, and we'll see what the future holds for him.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
A Weekend in Texas
We drove to Dallas / Ft. Worth last Thursday for my uncle's BBQ / family reunion. We weren't sure how Katie would do because the 4-hour drive to Branson got pretty tough at the end, and this was 9 1/2 hours! She did pretty well until just before 10:00, and then she fussed off and on until we arrived at midnight. I would love it if she could sleep in the car, but she only dozed off for about 30 minutes twice. Needless to say, she was pretty grumpy when we arrived, but she did alot better than we expected, so we were happy.
Due to people's schedules and preferences, we all got down there different ways. I drove with my mom, Maddy (my niece), Derek, and Katie. My dad flew down on Friday with Drew (my nephew) and Alex. Steve was at a conference in Orlando that week, so he just arranged for his flight to go to DFW instead of back to KC, and I picked him up from the airport around 5:30 on Friday. My brother and sister-in-law left after work on Friday and got in Saturday morning, and my oldest brother and his family already live in the Dallas / Ft. Worth area.
Friday morning, I took the kids to see my friend, Nanette, and her family in northern Ft. Worth. Spencer was in school, but the rest of us went to McDonalds for lunch. Nanette and I had a lovely visit while the kids played. Here's Derek, Maddy, Katie, and Serena.
Next, we drove north of Dallas to see my friend, Jennifer, and her family. I got to hold her new baby, Olivia, who was just born last Tuesday, and Derek loved holding George, her Guinea pig. Katie was "resting," and was not particularly happy about the arrangement.
After picking up Steve at the airport, we drove to my uncle's house, which is north of Fort Worth, for a family dinner. It is always wonderful seeing family again each year. I finally got reunited with Alex who had been with one or both of my parents for the previous 26 hours, Derek got lots of snuggles, and Katie did very well meeting all these new people. She clung to Maddy quite a bit, but she also allowed others to hold her, too. With all the time Katie and Maddy spent together, they developed a beautiful bond. As much as Katie thinks I hung the moon, she started preferring Maddy on this trip. I told Maddy that if she ever needs a self-esteem boost to just hang out with Katie for awhile! The way Katie looks at Maddy with such sheer adoration is so heart-warming.
Saturday morning, we went to see my friend, Arian, and her family just north of Ft. Worth. Alex and Logan are 2 peas in a pod, and had a great time together. Katie played with Emme's toys, and Derek entertained himself with a roaring dinosaur. It was a lovely visit. Here's Derek, Katie, Alex, Logan, and Emme.
Due to people's schedules and preferences, we all got down there different ways. I drove with my mom, Maddy (my niece), Derek, and Katie. My dad flew down on Friday with Drew (my nephew) and Alex. Steve was at a conference in Orlando that week, so he just arranged for his flight to go to DFW instead of back to KC, and I picked him up from the airport around 5:30 on Friday. My brother and sister-in-law left after work on Friday and got in Saturday morning, and my oldest brother and his family already live in the Dallas / Ft. Worth area.
Friday morning, I took the kids to see my friend, Nanette, and her family in northern Ft. Worth. Spencer was in school, but the rest of us went to McDonalds for lunch. Nanette and I had a lovely visit while the kids played. Here's Derek, Maddy, Katie, and Serena.
Next, we drove north of Dallas to see my friend, Jennifer, and her family. I got to hold her new baby, Olivia, who was just born last Tuesday, and Derek loved holding George, her Guinea pig. Katie was "resting," and was not particularly happy about the arrangement.
After picking up Steve at the airport, we drove to my uncle's house, which is north of Fort Worth, for a family dinner. It is always wonderful seeing family again each year. I finally got reunited with Alex who had been with one or both of my parents for the previous 26 hours, Derek got lots of snuggles, and Katie did very well meeting all these new people. She clung to Maddy quite a bit, but she also allowed others to hold her, too. With all the time Katie and Maddy spent together, they developed a beautiful bond. As much as Katie thinks I hung the moon, she started preferring Maddy on this trip. I told Maddy that if she ever needs a self-esteem boost to just hang out with Katie for awhile! The way Katie looks at Maddy with such sheer adoration is so heart-warming.Saturday morning, we went to see my friend, Arian, and her family just north of Ft. Worth. Alex and Logan are 2 peas in a pod, and had a great time together. Katie played with Emme's toys, and Derek entertained himself with a roaring dinosaur. It was a lovely visit. Here's Derek, Katie, Alex, Logan, and Emme.
Now that the whole family had arrived, we all had lunch together before getting a new family photo taken - there's 14 of us now. We spent the evening at Uncle Cecil's BBQ, and we all had a great time. Katie was no longer shy around all the new family, and just made herself at home with everybody. I didn't get a lot of pictures, but I know my cousins did. During the BBQ different people get up and sing. Derek sang "Jesus Loves Me" and "Happy Birthday" to Nana, whose birthday is Thursday. Here's some video of "Happy Birthday." The picture isn't very good because it was dark, and the mike was going in and out a little bit, but you get the idea.
Alex played on a rock pile for hours with other little boys (surprise, surprise), and Katie made the rounds, dancing and playing with just about anybody.
Sunday morning we all met for brunch before driving home. All I can say is portable DVD players make traveling so much easier! We pulled in our garage at around 8:00, relieved it was a decent hour. It was a hectic trip with many late nights and very few naps, but the kids did great, and I was thrilled to be able to see 3 of my college friends.
On another note, we had Katie's pictures taken several days ago, and they're now available online. I thought you might like to see them. She was a little hesitant at first, but then she warmed up to the camera and had a good time. Just click on the link below, and enter KAREN TRISCHLER for the customer name. I hope you enjoy them.
https://www.smilesbywire.com/home.asp?AC=LTPP0395102135JCP
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Date Night!
We had our first date night since bringing Katie home, and it was nice. We've been practicing with her to teach her that when we leave, we always return, and she's been doing really well with that. About 10 days ago, we went to our first MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) meeting, and she was in a room with about 10 other kids and 2 adults. She cried when I left (as I knew she would), but it only lasted a few minutes and then she did great the rest of the time. Last Wednesday, Steve's parents came over and watched the kids while we took a walk around the neighborhood with our cell phone. She did very well, and the weather was absolutely gorgeous for our walk! Then, on Saturday night, we went to Starlight Theater to see Les Miserables. For those of you who don't know, Starlight is an outdoor theater, which plays 5 Broadway shows and countless concerts each summer. We've had season tickets for the Broadway shows for about 10 years, and we love going there. We missed Fiddler on the Roof in August, because we were in Russia, and we were hoping to get to see Les Mis. Well, Katie did great! She didn't have any tears, and went to bed just fine with Grandma and Grandpa, and Steve and I thoroughly enjoyed Les Mis. The only bad part was the weather. It rained the entire show. Starlight doesn't cancel for rain, so we were all outfitted in our ponchos and ball caps. There are very few shows for which I will sit in the rain for 3 hours, and Les Mis is one of them. It was nice having a date night again, and nicer still that Katie did so well.
Today, we had kind of a "date afternoon" as we went to the Chiefs game. My mom kept the kids at her house, and once again, Katie did great. My dad, Steve, and I went to the game, which was less than memorable. Neither the Raiders nor the Chiefs are very good this year, and we lost 23-8. The most exciting part for me was the singing of the national anthem, which was done by David Cook (this year's American Idol winner) and his brother, Andrew. It was a beautiful rendition, and their voices just soared. I'm also a sucker for a good male singing voice. The most exciting part for Steve was waiting for my dad and me to return with the brats and cokes!
Today, we had kind of a "date afternoon" as we went to the Chiefs game. My mom kept the kids at her house, and once again, Katie did great. My dad, Steve, and I went to the game, which was less than memorable. Neither the Raiders nor the Chiefs are very good this year, and we lost 23-8. The most exciting part for me was the singing of the national anthem, which was done by David Cook (this year's American Idol winner) and his brother, Andrew. It was a beautiful rendition, and their voices just soared. I'm also a sucker for a good male singing voice. The most exciting part for Steve was waiting for my dad and me to return with the brats and cokes!
Monday, September 8, 2008
Russglish
Well, Katie is keeping us on our toes. Since she was speaking all sorts of Russian, we learned what many of her phrases meant. There were still some that we couldn't figure out, but we did the best we could. Now, she's sprinkling in some English words just to keep us off balance. At first I was puzzled at the new phrases and words I was hearing and was at a loss as to their meaning when I realized that she was speaking English! So now when she speaks we have to first decipher if it's Russian or English, and then determine her meaning. Even though she is speaking some English, she doesn't always pronounce the words correctly, thus adding to the confusion. We're muddling our way through, though, and enjoying this once-in-a-lifetime adventure!
Her sleeping is coming along nicely. Now she's just mad about having to go to bed instead of being sad or scared. Her naps are sporadic - some days she sleeps, and others she just lays there singing to herself. However, she's sleeping about 10-11 hours at night! She's often fussy during the day, which may indicate sleepiness, but really it's because she doesn't like to be told "no." Steve and I actually chuckle to ourselves sometimes at her drama, because she's usually not even in trouble. She'll ask for something (my shoes, my cell phone, Alex's Leapster, etc.), I'll tell her "no" or "not now," and she'll either sulk, cry, scream, or throw herself on the floor in a tantrum. You see, in the orphanages, everything was community property. If she saw it, she could have it (as could any of the children). She doesn't understand yet that some things belong to certain people. She'll get there, of course, but it will take some time.
We are having a come-and-go party this Saturday the 13th from 3:00-5:00 so that anyone who wants to meet Katie can. If you are in the KC area and did not get my email invitation, then I either don't have your email address or it was an oversight. We would love to see you on Saturday!
Her sleeping is coming along nicely. Now she's just mad about having to go to bed instead of being sad or scared. Her naps are sporadic - some days she sleeps, and others she just lays there singing to herself. However, she's sleeping about 10-11 hours at night! She's often fussy during the day, which may indicate sleepiness, but really it's because she doesn't like to be told "no." Steve and I actually chuckle to ourselves sometimes at her drama, because she's usually not even in trouble. She'll ask for something (my shoes, my cell phone, Alex's Leapster, etc.), I'll tell her "no" or "not now," and she'll either sulk, cry, scream, or throw herself on the floor in a tantrum. You see, in the orphanages, everything was community property. If she saw it, she could have it (as could any of the children). She doesn't understand yet that some things belong to certain people. She'll get there, of course, but it will take some time.
We are having a come-and-go party this Saturday the 13th from 3:00-5:00 so that anyone who wants to meet Katie can. If you are in the KC area and did not get my email invitation, then I either don't have your email address or it was an oversight. We would love to see you on Saturday!
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Where Do I Fit In?
Katie got her first haircut with Auntie J about 10 days ago so now it's much more even than before. Katie did great, and just sat there as still as a statue until she was finished. Auntie J even styled it for her and Katie loved that!
Katie and Derek are getting along very well. Whenever Derek asks where Katie is, she is pretty good about responding (when prompted). One night, Steve was reading a bedtime story to all the kids, and Katie stood up, walked over to Derek, and sat in his lap. The amazing part is that Derek actually let her stay and didn't push her off! He generally doesn't like to have people in his "space," but he made an exception for Katie.
Alex and Katie are getting along more like a typical brother and sister do. Katie pretty much loves Alex all the time, but Alex is sometimes bothered by his little sister. Some days he loves playing with her, other days he wants to be alone, and still other days he is somewhat mean to her. He is learning to adjust to our new family dynamic as much as the rest of us are. We've had some good talks with him, and he's been open and honest with us. We told him how much Derek struggled when we brought Alex home almost 3 1/2 years ago, but now they are wonderful brothers and friends. I think that helped Alex. Alex was a little more emotional and clingy for awhile, but he seems to be doing better in the last few days. We are also trying to make sure that we don't expect too much from him. He's still 6, and we are trying to make sure that we don't suddenly ask him to become an assistant parent. Also, there are many things that Alex can do independently that neither Derek nor Katie can do due to age and development. Therefore, Derek and Katie naturally get attention as we help them with these tasks. We are making a concerted effort to give Alex just as much attention, if not more so, and that seems to be working as well. All this being said, I wouldn't even say that Alex is struggling. It's probably more accurate to say that he is just trying to figure out our new family dynamic, and we are so proud of him.
Katie and Derek are getting along very well. Whenever Derek asks where Katie is, she is pretty good about responding (when prompted). One night, Steve was reading a bedtime story to all the kids, and Katie stood up, walked over to Derek, and sat in his lap. The amazing part is that Derek actually let her stay and didn't push her off! He generally doesn't like to have people in his "space," but he made an exception for Katie.
Alex and Katie are getting along more like a typical brother and sister do. Katie pretty much loves Alex all the time, but Alex is sometimes bothered by his little sister. Some days he loves playing with her, other days he wants to be alone, and still other days he is somewhat mean to her. He is learning to adjust to our new family dynamic as much as the rest of us are. We've had some good talks with him, and he's been open and honest with us. We told him how much Derek struggled when we brought Alex home almost 3 1/2 years ago, but now they are wonderful brothers and friends. I think that helped Alex. Alex was a little more emotional and clingy for awhile, but he seems to be doing better in the last few days. We are also trying to make sure that we don't expect too much from him. He's still 6, and we are trying to make sure that we don't suddenly ask him to become an assistant parent. Also, there are many things that Alex can do independently that neither Derek nor Katie can do due to age and development. Therefore, Derek and Katie naturally get attention as we help them with these tasks. We are making a concerted effort to give Alex just as much attention, if not more so, and that seems to be working as well. All this being said, I wouldn't even say that Alex is struggling. It's probably more accurate to say that he is just trying to figure out our new family dynamic, and we are so proud of him.
Weekend at the Lake
We went to Table Rock Lake for Labor Day Weekend, and all the kids had a wonderful time. We went with my parents and my brother and his family. Katie got her first taste at swimming / floating in the lake, and once she got over her initial trepidation, she enjoyed it for short periods of time. Here she is with 2 of her cousins, Maddy and Drew.
Derek knows how to go boating in style. All he needs is a fruity drink with an umbrella in it!!
Grandaddy, Alex, and Drew enjoying an evening boat ride with Uncle Andy at the helm.
Katie really took to the boat, and didn't seem to be afraid at all. In fact, on Monday morning before we left to come home, we took one last boat ride, and she fell asleep lying down in the front of the boat. She stayed asleep despite all the crashing we did on the waves.
Katie, Alex, Maddy, Drew, and Derek. What a great group of cousins who love each other very much.
Katie even rode the innertube with me (twice!), but I didn't have my camera with me that time. She was really a trooper and hung in there even when we went airborne a couple of times. After one pretty big set of waves she let us know that she had had enough, though.
The kids always have such a great time when we go to the lake, and they even got to play with some neighbor kids on Monday morning. The neighbor boy and Alex are "lake best friends," and the big sister was like a mom to Katie, carrying her everywhere. The fact that Katie was okay being without Steve or me for awhile was a big step for her. She also went on a golf cart ride with Grandaddy - without Steve or me. These are big steps for her.
Last week on Monday I left the house for an errand, leaving the kids with Steve. The fit and tantrum that Katie pitched was worse than anything I had ever seen from any child anywhere! Katie had been fine when Steve had left, but she clearly was not fine with me leaving. I paused at the door, wondering if I should leave when Steve looked at me (holding a kicking and screaming child) and said, "Just Go!" We wanted her to learn that it's okay for mom to leave, because mom will return. She calmed down after awhile and was fine the rest of the time I was gone, so the next 3 evenings I left for an errand. On Tuesday she cried (but no fit), on Wednesday she was sad (but no tears), and on Thursday she blew me kisses, waved, and said, "Bye-bye." Whew. We haven't tried both of us leaving yet. At the lake it was different because she was the one walking out the door - not us. Each day we are building more trust, a stronger bond, and a greater attachment. She is doing great!
Derek knows how to go boating in style. All he needs is a fruity drink with an umbrella in it!!
Grandaddy, Alex, and Drew enjoying an evening boat ride with Uncle Andy at the helm.
Katie really took to the boat, and didn't seem to be afraid at all. In fact, on Monday morning before we left to come home, we took one last boat ride, and she fell asleep lying down in the front of the boat. She stayed asleep despite all the crashing we did on the waves. 
Katie, Alex, Maddy, Drew, and Derek. What a great group of cousins who love each other very much.
Katie even rode the innertube with me (twice!), but I didn't have my camera with me that time. She was really a trooper and hung in there even when we went airborne a couple of times. After one pretty big set of waves she let us know that she had had enough, though.The kids always have such a great time when we go to the lake, and they even got to play with some neighbor kids on Monday morning. The neighbor boy and Alex are "lake best friends," and the big sister was like a mom to Katie, carrying her everywhere. The fact that Katie was okay being without Steve or me for awhile was a big step for her. She also went on a golf cart ride with Grandaddy - without Steve or me. These are big steps for her.
Last week on Monday I left the house for an errand, leaving the kids with Steve. The fit and tantrum that Katie pitched was worse than anything I had ever seen from any child anywhere! Katie had been fine when Steve had left, but she clearly was not fine with me leaving. I paused at the door, wondering if I should leave when Steve looked at me (holding a kicking and screaming child) and said, "Just Go!" We wanted her to learn that it's okay for mom to leave, because mom will return. She calmed down after awhile and was fine the rest of the time I was gone, so the next 3 evenings I left for an errand. On Tuesday she cried (but no fit), on Wednesday she was sad (but no tears), and on Thursday she blew me kisses, waved, and said, "Bye-bye." Whew. We haven't tried both of us leaving yet. At the lake it was different because she was the one walking out the door - not us. Each day we are building more trust, a stronger bond, and a greater attachment. She is doing great!
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